Last night, I dreamt of a stranger who was lost and when I asked him where he wanted to go, he replied “Love”.
Since the time I woke up, I’ve been thinking about this particular dream and I decided to pen it down, before i forget about it.
Have you guys ever..lost your way in “love”?
Have you also struggled hard or perhaps, still struggling to reach that destination called “love”?
Have you lost your “love” during your voyage of “love”?
Well! I believe, as a young girl, love for me was my mum and dad’s hugs and kisses, my tiny pet’s warm cuddles & chases and my teddy bear’s cosy homely snuggles.
As a 16 year old, love for me, slowly started to transform into my first so called high school sweetheart love, when I was absolutely elated… almost in an euphoric state!
Soon after, in my 20’s, love for me was taking a new leap. I was in search of a much happier, much loyal and possibly, less proprietorial kind of companion.
As you can obviously tell..that “love” for me, by now…had turned into a person, who I thought would complete me, but in return kept failing me.
By mid 20s, “love” had turned into nothing but a perilous place, that I urgently needed to slip away from and sail away..somewhere far far away….
During this transition, I slowly began to explore my ownself. I started doing things, just to please myself and at the same time, I was also attempting to learn the flair of how *not* to try too hard to please others.
From time to time, I would tell myself “it’s ok to let it out or maintain space if you’re not comfortable, you don’t have to overcompensate so much just to fit in.” And soon enough, I realized, that I no longer felt the need of being acknowledged by somebody’s sugar coated words and gestures.
Little by little, I was coming into terms with the fact that not everybody is going to love us. We humans are full of flaws and differences. However, if we only have good intentions, we don’t really need to change the way we are. Eventually, a few like minded people will come along anyway, and that’s the time, you can share your magic with one another. It may sound like a cliche, but ultimately, that’s the only thing that truly matters and I genuinely mean it.
This minute, I was slowly starting to see the light and it turns out, as luck would have it, I had landed into my much anticipated destination of “Love” called “Self – Love”.
Self love does not require us to be single, rather..it just does not allow anybody else to steal our spark, our exuberance.
Self love to me is being able to recognize a place/person, where you no longer belong and to be able to walk away with grace, no matter how broken you are..but just because you savvy that this is no good for both sides.
Self love is learning the fact that no other person completes us, be it family, friends or our partners. We are an individual human being and we all have the ability to shine through as one single being. Thriving and growing together is what makes more sense to me but we cannot have somebody else complete us.
Today, the word “Love” holds a completely different meaning in my life.
“Love” for me is my beautiful family who cares for me unconditionally. “Love”for me is a handful of gorgeous hearted friends who keeps me sane and enriches my life, “Love” for me is music .. my absolute best friend whom I can’t do without, my rustic dear fountain pen and old crisp journals, it allows me to be utterly honest yet it never judges. Also, I totally adore books, birds, flowers, and all the other delicate equisite things that we humans are blessed with in this universe and how could I not mention my endless cups of tea.. I also call it my magic potion.
And last but far from least, love for me, is my dear husband who brings out the best in me and if I had to describe him in just two words, it would be “ Gentle” & “Kind”.
So yes! Have you arrived at your destination yet?
And if you’re there, kinda lost..trying to find a way out, I hope this post helps you find a much easier route with new directions your way..
Love and light always. Bon voyage!